Fight your Instincts?
by UrDadSaidICouldntUseTheDoor
Summary: Jacob loves Bella more than anything. But is it strong enough to go against imprinting. When an old friend returns, she causes a lot of drama. FULL SUMMARY ON THE INSIDE! R & R!
1. Chapter 1

Here is a new story idea of mine. Read and review- tell me if ya'al like it!!!!! Usually I do a sumarry for the first chapter, then see if people would like me to continue.

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Jacob is madly in love with Bella, that much is clear. Night and day, she is all he can think about. But is his love for her strong enough to go against imprinting? When a new girl moves to the reservation, he falls in love. Now he can't get her out of his mind. Something in the back of his head is screaming; No! You love Bella! He tries to fight the imprinting, and it nearly drives him insane. Can he ever find his love for Bella, or will he realize that the only way to be happy is to follow his instincts? 


	2. Chapter 2

This is the first chapter of my story. Read and Review please!

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JPOV 

I was on patrol duty with Embry and Quil, and wasn't enjoying it. It was almost pitiful how hard they tried to cheer me up. Quil started dancing, and Embry was chasing his tail.

"Come on Jake, normally you start cracking up when we do these things," Embry said, back in his human form. I ran into the woods, changed, and went back. Rain was starting to fall, drenching my hair, and threatening to evaporate off my skin.

"I'm not in the mood for laughing". I can't even remember the last time I laughed, unless I was with Bella. Something about her just made me smile. When they saw that I wasn't going to talk anymore about it, they just talked to each other.

"I saw Claire again today. She so smart for her age". Quil was always talking about Claire. Stupid imprinting; I could stare at Bella all day long and still not imprint. I growled lowly, warning Quil that he should shut up.

"Jacob, don't let your moods affect us. Your just as bad as that blond leech". I whirled around at ran towards him.

"Don't ever compare me to a leech!" My hate for them was stronger than any other person's in the pack. Those blood-suckers were the reason I was like this. Bella chose Edward over me, even though he left her. I was the one who filled the hole in her heart, I was supposed to be her sun. Now my bright rays are being blocked by an eclipse, and the darkness was affecting my mood.

"We weren't comparing you to them Jake, just to the power he has to manipulate emotions".

"Then why can't I make Bella love me," I mumbled to myself. Well, she did love me. She had admitted that during the war,after she kissed me. It's just that she loves Edward more. I was just waiting for Edward to do something stupid so that I can save Bella again.

Of course, I'm not always the superman. She has saved me before. When I had my transformation, I just kept thinking about her. She helped me get through it, but she doesn't know it.

My shift was over, and I could see Sam off in the distance, watching out for unwelcome visitors. He too, had imprinted. Every time he saw Emily, he fell in love all over again. I could see it in his eyes. I could also see the pain, whenever he looked at the long scar that he had created. That was something I had to think about. Would I risk the fact that I could do that to Bella, no matter how much I loved her?

The rain was falling harder now, spraying all over my uncovered torso. I wasn't ready to go home yet, so I decided to go for a run; wear-wolf style. Running faster and faster, I jumped into the air, phasing into a huge russet wolf. My fur was long and shaggy like my hair; just the way Bella liked it.

My paws hit the ground hard, trying to get a grip on the wet soil. I panted heavily, keeping up my quick pace for an impossible time. I knew where I was going. It was where we camped overnight, waiting for the war to began. Bella was so cold, she almost got hypothermia. Of course, the leach couldn't do anything to help her. He asked for me to fetch a space heater, and I did. I crawled inside the already cramped tent, and spent the night keeping Bella warm.

The best part though, was when she said my name. Normally she said Edwards name, the name of the person she loved. I guess her feelings came out then. I lay down on the ground, replaying the scene in my head. The rain eased up some, and I fell asleep. Phasing back to my human form, well, as human as I'll ever be. But at least I'm not a monster.

That night I dreamed of Bella, as I had every night. Instead of me receiving an invitation to her wedding, Edward had to deal with the pain of getting an invite to ours. Opening it up, and seeing our names together. Thats the way it should be. She would walk down the isle, smiling her beautiful smile at me. Just a few I dos later, and she would be mine for life. At least with me she could have a child.

The dream had to end, just like all of the others. As of now, dreams were better than the actual reality. A reality that I refused to face. How was it possible for someone to love someone else so much, but them not to return the feeling as strong? Another one of the mysteries of life.

It was light outside, so maybe Bella would visit me today. At least I had that to look foward to. I ran out of the meadow, still in human form. I had no shoes on, or a shirt, but my body heat kept me warm. I ran by the meadow, and something caught my eye; something was sparkling. I took a few steps back, and saw Bella with...him.

His shirt was off and she was stoking his chest. "I love you", she whispered to him. My face twisted in pain. I should be the one she was saying that too. She looked over to me for a moment, her eyes saying I'm sorry. I turned my head and ran off to my house, fighting the urge to punch through a wall.

I guess she's made her decision.


	3. Chapter 3

SECOND CHAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! more reviews please???????

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BPOV 

I looked up from Edward into the eyes of Jake. Hurt was expressed cleary over his face, as if to say "Why Bella?" I felt bad enough as it was after leaving Jake, and this didn't help. Edward didn't even need to look up to know who was there. He had probably smelled him, or heard his thoughts. Oddly, Edward didn't look angry like he usually did around Jacob. He almost looked sorry.

"What"? I asked him, gazing into his topaz eyes.

"It's nothing", he murmured.

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EPOV 

Well, it wasn't really nothing. It was something big actually. Even though I hated wear-wolves, I couldn't bring myself to hate Jake. After all, he helped to save Bella after I left, pieced her back together after I tore her apart. And the love he felt for her was just like what I felt for her. And she was my everything.

I guess that if I put myself in his situation, I would probably have that look on my face. But he needed to realize that it was the way it was, Bella had chosen who she wanted to be with.

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JPOV 

Well- there went my day. That stupid look on his face! I didn't need any sympathy from him. If only we hadn't made that stupid treaty. They wouldn't be living here, and Bella would still be mine. Hundreds of things could have not happened and Bella would love me.

My cell phone rang in my pocket, playing a sad tune. "What?" I said angrily into the reciever.

"Jake, chill out, It's Quil. Do you remember Ryley Addison from when we were five?"

"Yeah". She was one of my best friends, but she had to move away.

"Well, she's moving back".

"Great!" I actually was happy. I lost touch with her a few years ago, and had been wondering what was up with her.

"That's not the best part though. Man, she's changed a lot since we were five. She should be getting here tomorrow".

"Well, we should have some sort of a welcome back party". Maybe Bells would come I thought to myself.

"Sure, well, got to go. Emily's making us dinner, and I'm starving."

I laughed. Quil was always starving. I put the phone back in my pocket, and sat down on a bench. Ryley was awesome, really tom-boyish. We used to hang out almost every day. Well, maybe we'll get that relationship back.

My stomach grumbled louder than I thought possible. I ran the rest of the way home, smelling the food from a mile away.

When I got there my jaw dropped. The entire kitchen was filled with food. "Emily, what is with this?"

"Well, I decided to have the entire pack over for dinner".

I started laughing. "Your going to try an fit an entire pack of wear wolves in the house?"

She playfully smacked my arm. "I can do it just fine." Emily was able to do the impossible. My eyes caught on the scar that ran down her. I tried not to stare, and looked away.

Dinner was great. We ended up eating all of the food, not that it surprised any of us. Talking and laughing, just having a great time. I even laughed this time when Embry started to dance.

The sun was setting now, and I had patrol duty with Paul and Jared. Running to the woods with them, I phased mid-jump. We were right at the the border, hidden in the trees. As usual, nothing happened that night. Nothing had happened since the war with Victoria.

I walked inside my house, sitting down at the table. The envelope addressed to Jacob Black was still on the table. A corner of thick white paper fell out of the envelope. I already knew what it said, I had read it at least thirty times. It was that stupid wedding invitation. I didn't feel like letting that ruin my mood, today was when Ryley would come home. She probably was here already. I took the short-cut I knew to her old house, straight through the woods. We had left a well-worn path from all of the times we went to each other's houses.

On the corner of a huge gray rock was scratched Ryley and Jake. We did that a few days before she moved to California. I always wondered how she was liking the hot weather. She was always the one who ran through the rain, and played in the snow.

Sitting down on the rock, something caught my eye, someone was walking towards me."Jake?" The voice said in a quiet, hushed tone. I looked up into a pair of dark brown eyes.

I was in love.

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MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA CLIFFY!!!!! Now, review and I will update sooner. 


	4. Chapter 4

Okay- I'm sorry to everybody for the super mean cliff-hanger. Ryan's evilness is taking over me!!!!!!!! Now lets just hope I don't set off the metal detectors... (he wore tripp pants on a field trip and we went to like 5 different meuseums and set off every single flippin metal detector!)

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JPOV 

It was love in the form of Ryley Addison. She had grown out her short hair and it now hung in soft curls to her waist. Her high cheek bones had become more prominent, and her eyes were outlined in think, curly eyelashes. Her copper skin seemed to glow, and her smile made me want to melt.

It took me a while to figure out how all of this feeling could have come to me so strongly; it was the work of imprinting. Everything that Quil and Sam had ever told me about it had come true at that moment. Yet, despite all of the love felt, I couldn't help but want to scream.

I loved Bella, and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I wanted to hold her, to hug her. Now I not only wanted that from Ryley, I needed it.

I looked into Ryleys eyes for a moment, then took off. "I'll explain everything later", I called over my shoulder. That was one of the hardest thigs I had to do, just walk away from her. It was like a magnetic force, attracting me to her. But I had to stop thinking about her, then maybe the feeling would go away. Everything would go back to normal.

I avoided phasing, even though it would make me run faster. I didn't need the pack to know what had just happened, that would only make it worse. I wonder if she know what just happened, that I just fell in love. It was obvious in Quil and Sam's eyes, so maybe it was in mine too. She knew the legands, but not that they were real- now we'd have to tell her.

When I reached my house I ran inside and shut myself in my room. I paced back and forth, trying to stop thinking about Ryley. I didn't want to love her, I wanted to love Bella. How could I just give all of that up.

I had to try about a million different things to get Ryley off my mind. I counted all of the tiles in the kitchen(4250) , cleaned the entire house, worked on another car, and tried to sleep. No matter what I did She was all I could think about

The clock finally struck midnight, and I let out a sigh of relief.

I had survived the first day of hell.

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Yes- it's short-

but i have like no time to write- im grounded so i have to update this quick then write another chappy l8tr. REVIEW!!!!!!


	5. Chapter 5

Okay- I'm ungrounded. Here is a nice longerer (my new word) chapter to make up for the last bad one. I still only got like- five reviews. So- Read and Review!!!!!!! This chappy may seem a little weird- because it is about Jake having an internal conflict with himself.

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JPOV 

I had survived the first day of hell, but who knows how many more of them there could be. Could I really live like this for the rest of my life, afraid to go outside for the fear that I would run into Ryley. The pack still didn't know what had gone on between us, and was urging me to come to Ryley's welcome back party. I had to say no though, much to there surprise. They knew how close we were as little kids, how we had spent every moment of everyday together.

I guess that it didn't surprise me that I saw Ryley at the rock, i doubted that she could have forgotten how much we shared with each other. Like the time when she called me, out of breath, telling me to meet her there, when she found out her mom had died. She was really close to her mom, even closer than I was to her. I can remember the sound her cry, how even back then I never wanted to hear it again.

I wanted so bad to go see her, that it was literally driving me insane. Bella, I had to remind myself, Bella is who you love. You love her smile, her laugh, her brown eyes. But then there was always that voice in the back of my head, screaming at me, go see Ryley, don't fight your instincts.

Could I really count it as love if it was only my instincts, it wasn't even my choice. Maybe if she never moved away, we would be in a relationship, but I can never be sure. I loved Bella by choice.

Love- that word had been said in my mind more in the past couple days than I have ever heard in my life. But what was love anymore- just a strong feeling for someone, no matter how it happened. Dictionary defined it in twenty eight different ways, but none of them seemed to fit. I could think of one word though to describe the seemingly indescribable word- Ryley.

How far would I go to preserve my feelings for Bella? Would I have to lock myself in my room forever, which once you thought about it, wouldn't help much either. I haven't heard of anybody who has tried to go against imprinting, so maybe if I do, it will just go away. But do I want it to go away?

This huge conflict raged inside me, tearing me apart. It could be solved so simply, but I refused to. I was strong enough to fight off my instincts, I could do it for Bella. What if that leech hurt her again, and I couldn't patch her back up again because I was with Ryley. What would happen to her then?

Was Ryley even missing out on anything? She didn't even know about my imprinting on her, and I doubted she could have held a crush for me for so long. But Bella knew that I liked her. Speaking of people knowing about me imprinting on her, it was only a matter of time before Edward heard my thoughts. He would with no doubt tell Bella, and she would stop loving me. But it might make her jealous.

There are about a million things that this could all lead to. Bella and Me, Ryley and me, or neither. I couldn't imagine any of theses possibilities happening, they all seemed so far-fetched.

All of this thinking had killed some time, and I could see the sun trying to rise up behind the clouds. That's how I felt right now, like everything was hidden behind the clouds, just waiting for that rare sunny day when everything would become clear. The last sunny day I remember was when I happened across Bella and Edward in the forest, not exactly a happy experience.

Actually, I did have something good happen to me recently, I saw Ryley. I can still smell the sweet scent coming off her skin, like roses, My favorite scent now, which used to be frecia. Frecia was Bella's scent. Her soft brown hair was slightly darker than Bella's, same as with her eyes. And even though they were almost black, like mine, they were still full of warmth. I couldn't get over how gorgeous her petite face was, and how her copper skin glowed.

Just like Bella, I had a choice to make. Of course, her choice wasn't as difficult, because it was her choice. It was my instincts verses my love for Bella. I felt like the only way to solve this probably was to play some child's game for deciding, like flip a coin.

Heads is Ryley (because she is all I can think about), and tails is Bella. I flipped the coin, and it landed heads side up. I sighed, and tried again. After another thirty times, tails still hadn't come up once. Great, just another voice screaming at me to choose Ryley. The rest of the entire Day Two of Hell, I flipped that coin. I must have flipped it over two hundred times, and it hadn't landed tails side up a single time.

Was this ordinary coin trying to tell me something?


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you to all of my reviewers!!!!!! Here is yet another chapter for you guys!!!!!! Sorry for the huge wait between updates. My aunt came to visit- and I went to Alabama (with no computer) Going back in time a few days...

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RPOV 

I was moving back to La Push, after all of these years. Back with all of my fellow Quilettes, and Jacob. I doubted that he remembered me after so long, but I could hope.

I got here a day early and of course, the first place I wanted to go to was the rock, our rock. There was plenty of time for reunions later, but I needed to do this now. Clearly inscribed on the rock were our names, they hadn't faded a bit. His messy scrawl, and my small cursive. Two opposites that were exactly alike. Maybe we were still that way, and maybe we weren't. He probably had gone through puberty by now, and would look a lot different, but so did I.

My short hair had grown out much longer than before, and had darkened in color. My childish face was replaced by the face of a teen. I wasn't bad looking, but I didn't consider myself pretty.

Wind started to gently blow around me, my hair whipping across my face. I could hear twigs snapping somewhere nearby, but I was so tuned out that I didn't respond- until I saw his face.

Jacob Black had most definitely changed. His small, child's body was now tall as ever, and covered in muscle. His hair was long, pulled back into a pony-tail at the nape of his neck. His black eyes stared intently at me, and then realization hit him. Realization of what?

"Jacob?" I called out softly. Before I could even blink again he was off.

"I'll explain everything later." He called out over his shoulder. What could have caused him to leave so suddenly, and would he really explain everything to me? I hoped he would, it might explain how he could suddenly hate me. What happened to my old friend?

Rain started to drip through the massive canopy and onto me. I don't know how long I stood there- waiting for him to come back. My clothes were soaked, and I started shivering. Pneumonia was the least if my worries though. My dad was waiting though, and so was half the reservation. He warned me that they were going to try and throw a welcome back party- even though I hated attention.

Well- maybe there were a few people I wouldn't mind getting some attention from.

I made my way back to the house, dreading the outcome of my arival. If I did catch a cold- maybe they would leave. I wanted to see them all though, see if they had all changed as much as Jake. To my suprise, the small house was empty except for my dad. I looked at him questionally, and he laughed.

"Don't worry Ryley, I told them to come back tomorrow; that you were tired". I smiled and ran up to hug him- he always understood what I wanted. I ran upstairs to get ready for bed.

I turned the water in the shower all the way up. I may like the cold and rain- but I loved hot showers. The water was always so relaxing that sometimes I thought that I would fall asleep. I combed the tangles out of my hair, changed into a pair of pajamas, and crashed onto my bed; unable to sleep.

I tossed in my bed for a while, hoping that sleep would come. The minutes ticked by mroe slowly than I thought possible. Time never worked the way I wanted it too. Finally- my tired eyes won the battle and I drifted out of conciousness.

Everything was dark around me- but I could hear a voice off in the distance. It was low, and husky- but still soft. "Ryley", it called to me. I finally recongnized it, it was Jake.

A dim light grew around us as he stepped from in between the trees. His tall form looked menacing, and he was shaking as if trying to hold himself together. "I'm...no...good...for...you", he studdered as his body changed before me.In Jake's place was a large, russet brown wolf, staring at me with inteligent eyes.

Before I could scream my eyes snapped open. I looked around to make sure that I was still in my room, without the company of the wolf. Something seemed oddly familiar about it though.

Realization hit that today was my "welcome back" party. I got dressed, brushed my teeth, and went downstairs. I groaned audibly when my dad came down.

"Just survive for a few hours. It's at First Beach". I loved first beach, so that made it a little better. IT was nice out today, 50 degrees without chance of rain. So we could have a bonfire too.

I walked down to the beach with my dad, stalling the entire time. When I got there, it was more worse than I thought possible. There must have been over fifty people there. I recongized most of them though. Quil, who was playing with a toddler so he didn't notice me come up, Embry, Paul, Jared, and Sam. All of them were just as tall as Jake. They came up to shake my hand, welcoming me to La Push. It wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be.

I couldn't hide my diapointment when I noticed that Jacob wasn't there. Could he possibly hate me so much that he would come by to say hi? All of a sudden I felt nauseous. I sat down on a rock- letting the noises around me grow fainter as I fell out of conciousness again.


	7. HUGE AUTHORS NOTE

AUTHORS NOTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Listen- before all of you get mad at me for not updating- I have a reason. My mom was driving the car- and we got into a wreck. Nobody was seriously injured- but I had to stay in the hospital for a while and then stay here and recover. This update goes for ALL of my stories...

Anyway- I'm working on new chapters now


	8. Chapter 8

Okay- again. Sorry for not updating. I hope I haven't lost too many reviewers!

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QPOV 

I was busy playing with Claire, running with her along the beach. The sound of her laugher in my ear made me smile bigger than I thought possible. She was just about to fall asleep in my arms, when I heard a lout thud from the other side of the beach.

My head snapped up just in time to see Ryley before the crowd formed. Shouts of "Are you okay?" and "Call an ambulance!" were heard. I handed Claire over to Emily and made my way through the crowd. Though other people protested (because she hit her head) I picked her small body up in my arms, careful to be gentle with her. Embry had already gotten his phone out, and was calling the Doctor. Leech. Even though he was a bloodsucker, we trusted him more than most doctors around here; he did have hundreds of years of experience.

"Hello, Dr. Cullen, It's Embry. Yeah, from the reservation. Ryley was just here, and she passed out." He paused to listen to Carlisle. "Yes, she's breathing. Okay, see you soon." He said the last part while rolling his eyes. We may trust him, but it still wasn't the most pleasant thing to have your mortal enemy on your land.

"He said to keep her still, in case she did something to her spinal cord". I held onto her tightly, afraid to move her even a fraction of an inch. The leech was there within a few minutes, courteous to his super-speed. He walked up to Ryley, and began looking her over.

As soon as his cold hand came to a rest on her sweating forehead, her eyes snapped open. She looked around, trying to get her bearings. "Where am..." She began.

"I'm Dr. Cullen, and you must be Ryley. Do you have any idea why you might have passed out?"

RPOV

I tired to think of some disease I might have forgotten that I had, but could think of none. I shook my head no, which was a bad idea. My head spun wildly, the scene in front of me refusing to stay still. Eventually, my eyes began to adjust and the sand stayed where it was. I heard a soft musical laugh coming from the doctor.

"That probably wasn't the best idea", he said to me, and I grimaced. "Okay, just rest for a while, and you should be better."

"Thank you", I said, and went to get up. Before I could, Dr. Cullen had me in his stone cold arms, and handed me over to Quil.

"Get her home safely. You never know what could be lurking in the woods", he said, laughing again. Quil chuckled along with him, as if they shared some secret joke.

"Lets get you home kid", Quil said to me. Even though I was his age, he made me feel like a second grader. He walked (well, carried) me back to my house, and laid me down on the couch. My dad was already there because he had driven home.

"Thanks for getting her home", he said.

"No problem, it was like carrying a baby-doll." I tried not to roll my eyes, wincing at the pain it could have brought. I swallowed a few Tylenol's, changed into some pajamas, and went upstairs to try and sleep like Dr. Cullen told me too. Something about the way he and the Quilletts looked at each other made it seem as if they didn't like him much. His calm disposition never faded though as he checked on me, never glancing their way.

I willed for sleep to come, and eventually it did. Of course, there was only one person I was able to think about, and that led to me dreaming about him. We were in the woods, and he was speaking to me, or at least he was trying to. His mouth moved fast, but no sound came out. Like he was trying to tell me something I wasn't allowed to hear.

A frustrated look came over his face, and he ran off to the woods. I tried to follow him, but I couldn't keep up with him. He was faster than anybody I had ever known. Eventually, I became lost in the woods, and just gave up. I fell down to my knees as the rain just fell around me.

I woke up with my heart beating fast, and I looked around frantically to make sure I was still in my own room. The bed, walls, and desk were there, so I allowed myself to calm down. I got out of the bed, and looked for the pair of jeans I had discarded the night before. I dug through the pockets and found some loose change. Picking out a penny, i rolled it over in my fingers. I threw it up in the air and caught it in my opened hand, then flipped it onto the back of my other hand.

Heads I go see Jacob, Tails I stay here like the wimp I am.

I flipped the coin up once more, and caught it again. The tails size was up, staring at me as if disappointed. I sighed, and threw the coin up again, much higher this time. Tails, again and again. Wasn't this supposed to be 50/50?

I guess my dicision was made for me, I was going to stay home today and pretend like It wasn't killing me. I went back up into my room, and covered myself with as many blankets that I could find. The never-ending rain kept pelting against my window, reminding me even more that I was back in La Push, a few minutes walk from Jacob Black. But it would take me a million years to close that distance.

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Okay- here's your chapter. Please review if you still love me!!!!! 


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